I remember once several years ago going through a huge transformational shift. I scheduled a massage with Sabrina Channel. (Check her out if you are in the area. http://www.channelsofhealing.com She is an amazing practitioner.) I asked her, what is going on with my body? She said, Trina, you have gone through tremendous growth in the past few months. Your ego doesn’t like not having control. Hence the pain you are experiencing.
Here I am again, in the middle of a huge shift in consciousness. For the last three months, I have been trying to get my body back to a homeostatic place. I am down to 108 lbs. The smallest I have ever been in my adult life. The symptoms have taken their toll on me physically. I just went in for a plethora of blood tests.
The culprit is not unknown. The culprit is resistance. Most importantly the fear of change. Change in every aspect of my life. I have made a vow of acceptance with myself that, what I am experiencing is temporary but the outcome is life changing. I have talked about my changes throughout my blog, so these are not unknown to you as my readers. Most of what you may have interpreted are the physical changes, regarding the landscape of my journey. What I am unearthing is organic to say the least. I am stepping into a new dimension of myself; I love who I see looking back at me in the mirror.
I am choosing to let go of what lies beyond the familiar landscape of my past. I have been, up until now, a planner. I am stepping into the unknown. Totally trusting a power much great than myself to guide me is something I have never done. I know this is a great deal of what I am resisting. People have asked me what are you doing after your term in Jakarta? At this point, it has not yet been made known to me.
So why have I chosen to post about this? If your soul is calling you forward, remember this. The ego dislikes being uncomfortable. It will try and coerce you back to what is familiar. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt, I made the right decision taking this assignment. This assignment was much more than a job. No matter my ego’s perception of the perceived challenges, this has been a catalyst for my soul’s work in progress. My soul received a call I chose not to ignore and it was the best decision I ever made. I will continue to keep you posted as my path unfolds.
It has been a turbocharged year of change and personal growth. All is well…this much I know is true. A power much greater than myself told me so.